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To: The guy waiting impatiently at the bottom of the down escalator to run up.

From: Me

Did you know that, in fact, at the top of the escalator you are about to run up in your nylon shorts and sweatband there is actually a GYM!? Full of machines MADE OF STAIRS for you to run up! Really! Oh, ok, you like to shower there but not use their "newfangled" machines, got it.

To: The lady having her coffee and loudly giving her sister career advice over the phone in the locker room, then only getting off that call to take another one.

From: Me

Hey, know what? You won't believe it but there is a Starbucks right across the street! Yeah! And they have coffee there and you can sit talking on your phone as long as you like. Oh, and from what I can tell of your second conversation, it sounds like you might also have an office where you can take phone calls, the bonus being that naked people don't have to get by you to get to the hair dryer!
* * * *

Is it just me or is social behavior only getting worse. Honestly, I am not a parent but I don't blame the poor beleagured restranteur in Chicago who is getting flak for asking parents to keep their kids on good behavior at his cafe. I love these parents who say "So my kid is loud, this means I can't enjoy my coffee?" The answer is yes-- and if the escalator only fits one person, it means you shouldn't be running up it for exercise when you belong to the gym at the top, and just because you have a cellphone and people call you at 7 am doesn't mean you should take the calls in the locker room, and just because you have kids it doesn't mean other people should have to deal with their antisocial behavior in the social world that is a restaurant.

Phew, I feel better now. I think NaNoWriMo is making me cranky.

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